Long time, no write... looking up

My emotions, my equilibrium, my life seems a bit topsy turvy at the moment. Long story short, my husband and I had planned for his one year contract in Pittsburgh with FedEx through an agency called NSI in Houston, TX with a man named Ron Davis. Contracts were signed, for both the job and a one year lease on an apartment (which has gone to collections). And in early March of 2009 the contract was cancelled. Because it crossed state lines, there is nothing my husband I can do to rectify the situation, except look up.

I look up into the sky and speak with God, I beg of Him to give to Mr. Davis what Mr. Davis has given us. I try to look up and let it go because God can punish Ron Davis so much better than I ever could. I look up and pray that my husband keep his strength as he is now away from home and I miss him so much at times that I cannot breathe. I look up and I pray that I not lose my patience with my boys, because though I am married, I feel like a single mother, and it's not fun, not fun in the least. I look up and I thank God for the challenges he has given my husband and I, because without them I'd not have grown. I look up and I beg God to give us a break, I beg Him to please hear me, please help me to save our home... because foreclosure is set for October 29, 2009. I look up and I thank God for my health, for my boys health, for my husband's health.... I look up and I see my God in everything, and sometimes I am very angry, but most times I am humbled.

We've learned so much, my husband and I, we've learned that a tiny bit is so much better than nothing. We've learned that we can go without, because the "things" we wanted so much cannot feed our boys. We've learned that we're made of stronger stuff than we ever knew, and we learned our relationship is strong. We've come back to one another during a life-changing, incredibly tough time in our lives, and we've realized, thank God, that we love one another!

So, what to do? Roll over and let the "system" run over us? Hell no! We will save our home. We will save our (considered old) autos. We will fix our credit - might take a few years, but we'll do it!

Too much is banging about in my head - cannot blog sufficiently today - suffice it to say when I write again, it will be to say we won, and we've learned.

God's Blessings to all, much love to my friends and family going through tough times, and those who are hurting. Though the planet seems smaller because we can communicate via webcams, email, telephone, cell phone, IM's, text message, what have you, it's gotten to be a much colder place, hasn't it? Seems no one is really listening. The next time you feel sad, alone, like you're not being heard, take that moment to really hear someone else. It may just save their life, and may make you realize what you've been missing out on.... just a thought :)

Angie